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Every year in video games brings with it some lovely surprises
At the end of each year, we like to take a moment to look back and complain about all the things that bummed us out. Hey, it’s part of the healing process! We let loose our bile ducts in 2012
After polling all of Kotaku’s staff for input, here are our biggest disappointments of 2015.
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Arkham Knight’s PC Version Is So Busted It Gets Pulled
We’ve never seen anything like it: Rocksteady and Warner Bros. released Batman: Arkham Knight on PC and the port was so totally fucked that they actually stopped selling it
This was a loser across the board—a good game was totally hobbled by seemingly foreseeable
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Too Much Bragging About Timed Exclusive DLC
2015 was yet another year where the folks at Sony and Microsoft dedicated a lot of press-conference time to boasting about the games for which they’d secured console-exclusive downloadable content. We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again: timed exclusive DLC is bullshit
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The Order: 1886 Lands With A Thud
When it was first introduced, The Order: 1886’s high-concept premise and gorgeous aesthetic were promising. The Knights of the Round Table have lived hundreds of years, and are now using souped-up Tesla guns to battle supernatural forces in Victorian London? Hell yes, sign us up. Unfortunately, the finished game was a brief, thrown-together mess
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The New 3DS Gets Literally Two Exclusive Games
It was exciting when Nintendo launched a whole new 3DS
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Metal Gear Solid V’s Story Falls Apart
How strange that Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain, a 2015 standout
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Cool Competitive Multiplayer Games Can’t Get Traction
Whatever the reason—overpriced games
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Nintendo Tramples YouTubers
YouTube is still somewhat uncharted territory when it comes to copyright regulations and fair use, so it makes sense that game publishers would be experimenting with the best ways to keep an eye on how people profit from their intellectual properties. Nintendo, however, got more than a little overzealous in 2015.
Their iron-fisted approach to YouTube regulation hurt the speedrunning community in particular, with some very cool Nintendo-related channels
As the moderately well-known pizza enthusiast PewDiePie put it, in an age when there are so many games for popular Let’s Players to choose from, Nintendo’s games just went to the bottom of a lot of lists. This kind of stuff threatens to erode some of the mountain of good will Nintendo has built over the years.
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Silent Hills Is Cancelled Harder Than A Game Has Ever Been Cancelled
On our “best surprises” list last year
Actually, you know what? Here’s a disappointment for you:
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Konami
Good god, Konami sure fucked it up this year. It’s not like they haven’t ever fucked it up in past years, but these guys just completely drove the bus off the cliff in 2015. Where to even begin? There’s the whole Silent Hills thing, which we just went over. There’s the report
And then there’s the colossal clusterfuck that was Metal Gear Solid V, wherein the publisher struck beloved director Hideo Kojima’s name from the box
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Phantom Dust Disappears Like A Phantom, Made Of Dust
Speaking of development woes, it was a bummer that Darkside Games’ Phantom Dust reboot vanished into thin air so soon after it surprised everyone at E3 2014
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PC Gamers Get The Worst Final Fantasys
Final Fantasy has always been associated more with consoles than with PC, but that doesn’t mean PC gamers deserve garbage ports of the series’ older entries. This year, the PC got new versions of Final Fantasy V
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No Red Dead Redemption Anywhere
Look, we don’t need Rockstar to announce Red Dead Redemption 2. We don’t need them to announce that the last-gen RDR is finally being ported to PC and current-gen consoles. We don’t need to replay John Marston’s adventure in HD, or even just to have Microsoft and Rockstar announce backwards compatibility so we can play the Xbox 360 version on Xbox One. We don’t need any of that, but it would make us so, so happy. Rockstar, don’t you want the whole world to be happy? It would appear that you do not.
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No Single-Player Grand Theft Auto Expansions, Either
Several people on our staff really like GTA Online, when we can find time to play. It can be good for a laugh, some of the new modes are fun
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Fallout 4 Doesn’t Quite Set The World On Fire
It’s not that Fallout 4 was bad, or even mediocre—it was really cool
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I Didn’t Finish Suikoden II
Just about every day, my colleague Jason Schreier asks me if I’ve played more Suikoden II. I’m sorry, Jason. I just haven’t had time. I know you’re disappointed; everyone is. I’m not sure what to say, other than that I’m sorry and I’ll try to do better.
I haven’t played any more Trails In The Sky, either.
I’m sorry.
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Halo 5’s Story Is A Big Wet Noodle
Hey, remember how Halo 5’s story was hyped as this extended chase sequence where one hero—Jameson Locke—was hunting down the other hero—series star Master Chief—for a mysterious crime the Chief may or may not have committed? Remember how they made this whole surprisingly clever, Serial-inspired podcast series to promote it? Oh man, it was gonna be so cool! Two squads, eight heroes, and one hell of a firefight, amirite?
Except no, the story was actually a big wet noodle that the game expected us to somehow eat with a spoon. Did you want Locke and Chief to have an epic, playable showdown? Sorry! Did you want a villain whose motivations made sense? Too bad! Did you want to be able to follow the narrative without having to read a bunch of tie-in books? Oh, well! Were you hoping to fight the same copy/pasted boss over and over and over again? Sorr—oh, actually, cool, in that case you’re covered.
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Valve And Bethesda Blow Their Paid Mods Experiment
Modders deserve to sell their work, if they’d like to. No one really disputes that. But the various ways that whole notion might work are certainly up for debate, and Valve’s first go at a paid modding marketplace
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Those were the things that disappointed us the most this year, but we’re sure you have plenty of disappointments of your own. Feel free to list ‘em in the comments below, and as usual, if one of your biggest 2015 disappointments was “Kotaku,” we promise we’ll do better next year.
To contact the author of this post, write to kirk@kotaku.com.
Konami joke image via @tortoiseontour.